26 April - Peak Hill CP, Sidmouth - Slipshod

Twenty-six hashers appeared for todays hash. The Virgin hare was Slipshod, his first trail or was it a trial?

We were given the usual instructions and in the absence of the sheriff and the deputy sheriff, Twin Peaks was appointed as "double-d" sheriff (deputy-deputy sheriff!). Many had a comment to make about the double-d sheriff but said nothing for fear of being fined.

The hash were off down a very steep decline to a check which it was soon discovered would take us back uphill. Many struggled with the instant climb with no chance to get their breathing in tune (nothing to do with not being fine athletes of course!). It was like climbing Everest or better named Never Rest.

Still, being made of strong stuff the hash plodded on as only hashers can, finally reaching a long/short split which was greeted with joy by the back markers. The shorts struggled to find which dots were current as there seemed to be left-overs from the Thursday night Otter Valley hash. It must have called for desperate measures as even Chesty and Ashe were required for checking!

As the longs met the trail, Stat-Nav emerged with the front his T shirt covered in dampness informing Groucho that it was good honest sweat and not because he had faced a water hazard.

Once we reached the first sweetie (not sweaty) stop, the hare produced a little feast of goodies whilst Chesty, fond as she is of nuts, tucked in to her own supply whilst she was heard to proclaim "I like nuts".

Meanwhile, Ashe found that all the waiting around was not helping her boredom threshold and decided to seek out her own entertainment in climbing trees. More about that to follow later!

Upon leaving the sweet stop the hare informed of a golf hazard only to repeat this again later. One hasher asked if the first white golf ball to be seen was the on-on, the hare turned green and drove us on to the next check through woodland and down to a gravestone marked SP. (Chad noted that this could be lined up for SPocky?)

As we continued on our way we suddenly encountered a dreaded back check to which Tail Lamp asked how many to go back - for this fatal error and his repeated sin of not understanding back checks - he was of course fined. Despite this error, I am pleased to inform you, the reader that there was no camp calling from Tail Lamp today during the trail/trial which is very encouraging.

It was on on to a hash halt with a "tree challenge" for the youngsters. Adults were able to join in but Mr Hide observed that the tree may buckle under the weight. Who was he referring to! The challenge was to cross a fallen tree whilst escaping the clutches of its branches and without falling into the bog underneath. The challenge proved successful and Ashe was first in line for more tree activity.

The second long short split was an absolute killer hill but this didnt deter the fast running Otter Valley youngster (who's hash name escapes us!) who attacked the long with vigour and reached the hash halt well ahead of any other long runners.

The drizzle had set in by the second sweetie stop and had dampened the view of the Sidmouth coast. It was on-on across to Peak Hill Cliff to run through a field of lovely sheep and ponies and the final long/short split.

Back in the car park, Spocky abandoned the circle to go and support X-Bitz and Odd-Bitz in their Tactical Commando Challenge. However, he wasnt gone for long as he realised he had forgotten his list of email addresses and so he returned just in time for fines and a naming ceremony!

There were fines for Stat-Nav for chatting up the double-d sheriff in an attempt to avoid a fine, Tail-Lamp for not understanding a back check (for the second week running), and many more trivial atroscities that the ruthless Twin Peaks dished out with glee.

There was a down-down for Ashe for wearing new trainers and in true tradition the drink was downed from the aforementioned trainer! She also had an official naming ceremony to crown her "TREE CREEPER".

Uphams Plantation Woodbury Common at 11.00 am (Between Four Firs and Yettington). Hare - Howling Wilf


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