23rd November - Odd Bitz + Fruity Bitz - Warren CP, Woodbury Common

Once again, a great turnout of hashers on this sunny, if not windy and freezing morning. A slight change of hare, just to keep us on our toes, not Tampa as expected but Odd Bitz who assures us he was ably assisted by Fruity Bitz who was nowhere to be seen. Maybe the trail flummoxed her as it did us as she is still out there somewhere........! Yes, we got off to a roaring start and all wandered around looking gormless for a fair while. Where's Radiohead and Spocky when you need them to check every single route while we wait around?! Eventually, the trail was found the other side of the main road. I think he's trying to conduct a 'hash cull', survival of the fittest, if you can't get across the road safely, you can't hash with us?! Anyway, we all made it only to set off on the wrong trail and found a back check. On eventually finding the correct trail we ended up in what looked like someones garden! With tennis courts, a lake with a lovely bench, hopefully they didn't mind!
After losing trail a couple more times but quickly finding it again, we came across the fish hooks. It would appear today that there were far more law abiding hashers on the trail as there was no cheating on the fish hooks..........or was there!!!! Ha! Ha! You'll never know!!! We emerged from the gorse, yes, it was in abundance today, to stop for the sweetie stop. Good sweetie choice today, fruit pastilles, always a winner, and Haribo. Or, if your name is Millie and you are black and furry, there was a lovely supply of flour to munch on, fresh from the bag!
Once again from the sweetie stop we wandered around aimlessly, eventually being called on over the M5, sorry, main road. It would then appear not everyone has quite mastered the '3 and on' concept as a stray group of hashers all shot off in the wrong direction, downhill too, ha ha. The wise old hashers didn't follow as they were watching the hare who made no move to follow them. Not all hashers are as stupid as they look! Well, not always anyway.
On On up the hill and onto the long/short split which brought us back around to meet the trail again, then on up towards the on home.
Hash fines were dished out by the deputy sheriff wearing was looked like a yellow duvet cover! One assumes the hash haberdash slightly overestimated the size of the deputy!!!! Up Yours was fined for using her husbands nerd name instead of his new hash name, Shit Slot, sorry, I mean, Slip Shod. The hare was fined for failing to inform dog owners about the M5 crossing. Also fined for inappropriate use of a back check. Stat Nav and Chad were fined for being a bit stupid as he said as they did the long split and came back to the trail to come across the split again, so off they set on the long again, going round in circles. I'm sure he was joking, but he was still stupid enough to tell this story to the Deputy, so they got fined anyway!
Thanks to the hare for finding some new ground, we thought we'd covered every inch of woodbury common, well done.
On On to Pines Ridge next week.


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