4th April - Joneys Cross - Tampa


23 hashers gathered in the spring sunshine and the wintry wind! It was noted that Tampa was on time for the hash for the 2nd week running. The same could not be said for Woodpecker who arrived at 7 minutes past....exactly. Tampa was also keen to point out that he'd managed to keep his feet dry thoughout laying the hash, then promptly stepped in quite a large puddle much to Spockys amusement, but that wasn't half as funny as when Spocky then stepped back into aforementioned puddle!
The hare gave us our instructions which today included a health and safety notice, the ground was so dry there must no smoking on the hash. It was also 3 and on, with no sweeties however the Easter bunny had visited.
We were pointed in the direction of 'on to check' but the all set off in the wrong direction. This was where Radiohead was to perform his first cheat of the day, he followed a false trail and and instead of coming back to follow the others he just waited at the check he'd found.Once everyone else started to catch up, he shot of into the distance only to lead everyone down to a back check so we all came back up the hill where the walkers and hare were still waiting. On their return the cunning hare sent them down the parallel path, to the bewilderment of everyone, he'd done the same thing again!
Woodpecker having caught everyone up was calling everyone on on from the front, not bad at his age.....but we're not allowed to mention his age. Over the road and down the hill to the first long short split of the day. Dr Jekyll set off on the long and fell in a bog up to her knees. On the shorts Up Yours and Flour Power ran past Stat Nav exclaining how fit they must be as they'd never overtaken him before. He was doing a bit of weight training today however with an extra stone and more strapped to him. While the shorts were checking out, Brains had to cycle back to try and find William who had disappeared, maybe he was chasing Roo again?
Shortly at the sweetie stop we searched for the Easter bunnies hiding place and when we found it were rewarded with all sorts of chocolate goodies. The longs arrived a short time later with Spocky beating Radiohead by a fraction. Itsy Bitz happily played with the stones before smearing mud on Stat Nav, helped by Spocky Bitz....obviously. After a quick hash flash we were sent on a back check all the way to the top of the hill.
On arriving at the road there was another long short split, however, Odd Bitz was telling people that there was a back check at the bottom of the hill so not to bother doing the long. Some fools however, still trotted off down the hill, while Tuned In and X-Bitz blazed the trail at the front! Whilst behind them, Jenny was found to be stipping at the roadside. We think this should probably have led to a naming of Flasher or something similar.
It was nice to see Mr Hyde, Marshall Farts and Tree Creeper back. So nice that Mr Hyde found himself a lovely back check at the bottom of the hill closely followed by Isosceles. On back up the hill they plod back onto trail.
Onto the last long short split where Radiohead set off on the short, his excuse being the 'L' for the long looked like a chevron! Because this is a well known hash marking isn't it Radiohead????? After coming across a fish hook he went to the back of the pack and then went on the long aswell.
Meanwhile X-Bitz and Tuned In were seen to be running......UPHILL!!!!!! Soon the 'on home' was called and we all gathered back in the car park, with Woodpecker arriving eventually.
Fines were handed out with Jenny receiving a fine for obedience, with Spocky telling Itsy to call on on but Jenny behind was good enough to do as she was told too. Radiohead got fined for many reasons, cheating mostly. I think William should've been fined for sexual harrassment for licking Roos bum continually.
On On to next week at Frying Pans car park.
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