10th July - Venmore Farm - Woodpecker + Tampa

Sunday 10th July Venmore Farm, Woodbury – Woodpecker & Tampa

As the time approached 11am it was noted that Woodpecker was there early….ah wait a minute…he was the hare! Actually, he was not the only hare! After announcing to the circle there was some confusion, that confusingly we never quite got to the bottom of, the by now confused hashers realised Tampa was assisting Woodpecker. Or was that….Woodpecker was assisting Tampa?!? Confused.com ….we most certainly were!

Anyway, as the hares had a combined age of over 130 years we were all quite sure we would be following a very ‘wisely’ laid trail. On On around the corner they pointed and off the group ran, through the first gate and up the hill to a check. Not for the last time the confused hashers were seen spreading out in all directions……which direction should we be going? 2 mins into the hash and Cousteau was observed facing a hedge in the bottom corner of the field. First fine of the day would be handed out for ‘spending a penny’! Eventually, the group noticed that the hares were still at the bottom of the field and the walkers were making their way towards a gate. This cunning pair had sent us up the hill for nothing! On On.

Back on track and the hashers were following Cousteau and Boots in Puss through the adjacent fields. On On through a gate and turning right up another hill to a check. This cunning pair wouldn’t pull the same trick again…….er yes they would! The hashers were spread out everywhere and then at one stage Twin Peaks started sprinting off and like sheep the group followed……unfortunately there was no flour on the ground and the hashers turned around and headed back across the field! Apart from one…..Stat Nav in his wisdom had carried on up across the top of the hill and momentarily went out of sight of everyone else. He checked through the gate into the road and found no marks, so decided to return to the group. At the same time the group had found the trail and followed it down and into the stream at the bottom of the field. Poor Stat-Nav was rather bewildered upon returning to the field as from the top of field he could not tell there was a stream and everyone had disappeared out of sight……30 seconds earlier he had been running around Woodbury with 30 people, now they had all vanished! He retraced he steps and ran back down the hill and into the previous field…no sign of anyone there. Then a few minutes later he saw Isosceles stood on the opposite field taking photos and headed off in the general direction.

It now became apparent that everyone was making they’re way through the stream and Stat-Nav was about to follow the familiar voices of X-Bitz and Woodpecker. “I’m getting very wet Woodpecker!” exclaimed X-Bitz……”it’s going to get a lot deeper in a minute!” replied the old crooner! Stat-Nav thought it was safer to take a 10p fine for keeping his feet dry than interrupt anything.

After an impromptu re-group it was On On and not far until the sweet stop where the walkers were already waiting. The stop provided Spocky with an opportunity to educate Itzy-Bitz on the wildlife that could be found in the fields of Woodbury. “Look at that Butterfly” said Spocky…..”that Butterfly looks remarkably like a Ladybird” stated one of the group. Poor Spocky….I think Itzy should be doing the educating in future!

At the sweet stop Woodpecker declared he was cutting it short (his participation in the trail that is!) and heading off to another engagement, but before he left he kindly pointed to a gate in the corner of the field and told us that was where we were going. Not sure he quite gets this hare role.

On On! The hash was off again and a few more twists and back-checks followed. At one stage the grass in the field was so long we almost lost Twin Peaks. Both Hares were later fined……for not losing Twin Peaks!

Before long we were back where we started, fines were dished-out by the sheriff, and Coffin handed out the pink hand-bag to Boots (for not knowing where the farm was, turning up late but more importantly for the fact the farm is 1 mile away from where he works!). The ‘old dudes’ had pulled off a great trail……pressure on Boots and Puss now to deliver as good a trail next week!
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