Sunday, March 29

29th March - Mincinglake Park - Geronomo + Emerald


A last minute flurry of hashers arrived resulting in a respectable 22 hashers despite a number of regulars missing. There were a number of new faces and some "irregulars". Unfortunately most of the regulars were still there too! Emerald admitted to a bit of Roger-ing in the woods which may explain a lack of flour for the first stage of the hash.
Marshal Farts only managed the first bend before taking a seat-stop on the bench in the sunshine. Of course for this misdemeanour he was fined. Emerald was heard to say it would be more successful to lay the hash in dog poo as there was an abundance of it but we soon caught up with the flour trail.
It was on on up over the 1st of many hills and many fish-hooks and on to the first long short split. The sun was shining as the hashers spread themselves over the fields and to another long short split over Drakes Meadow. Twin Peaks called an impromptu hash halt as she sat to take in the view. Tuned-In decided it was time for a hash photo of the scenery but unfortunately the hares had not arranged the sun from behind so photography excluded the view!
Having run for 45 minutes the hashers thought they had reached the sweetie shop but alas - no sweets!! It was on on down the road and onto the hash mud - it wasnt true hash mud as it didnt even cover our shoes.
The trail led along a track, past some horses and up into the woods... although you could be forgiven for thinking the trail led straight on as only a handful of hashers took the challenge in the woods! Dr Jekyll worried she had lost Marshal Farts but he was up front to the sweetie stop. Tampa took a liking to the mini eggs and the packet was half empty before the last hashers arrived.
Following the chocolate revival it was on on up yet another hill where Tuned In and Chesty were overtaken by a serious runner - of course it transpired this was not a hasher! Down the hill the other side and there were hash antics in the playground. Hashers were taking it in turns down the slide which had to be "watered" to make it slidy resulting in a wet patch for Howling Wilf. Masrhal Farts couldnt hang on any longer and took a pee break in the woods. Obviously he was fined again for yet another mis-demeanour.
The hashers arrived back at the car park for beer and nuts - just in time before JC cocked his leg and peed in the crate!!
Fines were awarded to Mashal Farts (as specified!), Twin Peaks for taking a rest, Groucho for not carrying the pink bag and trying to award it to someone else before he even carried it! Emerald for Roger-ing, Tampa and Chad for using technology on the hash and obviously JC for peeing on the beer and nuts.
Next weeks hash is at Daneswood Car Park near Killerton.

Sunday, March 22

22nd March - Bullers Hill CP - Groucho


It was a lovely sunny day and on Mothering Sunday our hare Groucho had promised the 'mother' of all hashes! Well it certainly started in true Groucho style.....we all parked in two different car parks......then we started and it was ON ON to the first long - short split.....where the short was longer than the long!!
We then crossed the road and on to check. A distinct lack of flour was then observed and we had to rely on the hare to point the hashers in the right direction. Spocky Bitz was in flight and leading the hash into the woods and as we started to spread out the familiar call of the Woodpecker was heard bringing up the rear (a welcome return Mr Woodpecker!!).
A few checks later and the hash was lost in the woods once more......but with a bit of help from the Hare the trail was picked up once more and it was ON ON to the swampy bogs (or the deep rain-forest as X-Bitz called it). Normal hashing service was now resumed as clean trainers became a thing of the past!
A steep hill climb, a long - short split and few fish-hooks later and we arrived at the Sweetie Stop. Today the Hare kindly provided biscuits to go with sweets. The sound of Howling Wilf explaining the meaning and origins of the word 'chivalrous' was the incentive the hashers were looking for to get moving. ON ON!
Through the woods and on to check at the track. Looking good we all thought until one back check later we again encountered the theme of the day......R.U....lost??? 10 mins went by before the call went out....ON ON!! At last, someone had found the trail and the way up through the woods to the re-group. Howling Wilf provided the group with his second interesting fact of the day....Seaguls can't burp!...and explode upon consumption of bi-carbonate of soda! (or something like that!!). This proved enough for the hashers once more and an eager ON ON call went up before he went for the hatrick of facts!
It was up hill from there as the hash twisted and turned through the woods on their way back to the car park...pausing briefly to admire the wooden carving of Groucho outside the 'Go Ape' hut!
Back at the car park and the circle was formed where we held another naming ceremony - this time for three people. Congratualtions to Pebble-Dash, Whiplash and Fla-syd.....enjoy explaining your new names to everyone that asks.
There are still 25 places to fill for the Autumn gathering (yes - its in the autumn!) so deposits to Groucho if you are interested. ON ON

A DATE FOR YOUR DIARIES

Don't forget the 10th May is City of Exeter H3 400th run. There will be a bbq on The Maer in Exmouth, BYO beer and food. The trail is being laid by Spocky Bitz from The Maer CP, Exmouth at 11am.

Monday, March 16

15th March - Four Firs CP - Chesty + Stat Nav


A beautiful spring morning greeted the hashers today. The sun was shining, the hares were back and we even had visitors, Tom and Suzanne. Chesty gave us the low down on what to expect, 3 and on, laid in flour, on the right, except if its on the left piped Stat Nav! Chesty also told us there were road crossings and there was also a trail being followed by horses, this was marked by pink ribbons and we'd hear them.......what, the ribbons?? Our sheriff informed us that today fines would be 50p each donated to Comic Relief with Spocky adding that hash cash would match the amount raised, rather generous we all thought, until he pointed out that it was our money anyway....oh yeah!! Stat Nav added that there would be fish hooks on the run which were for 3 people if no number was specified, the sheriff querying if the number said 3 did that mean 6? This was getting far too confusing, best we set off. On to check we went and duly spent the next 5 minutes looking a bit lost. Eventually Groucho, yes, you heard correctly, Groucho called on on! Onto another check called by Groucho who then got his comeuppance for being an FRB by getting the first fish hook.
The trail was well laid here as it seemed most people kept checking the wrong way! On down hill to the long short split. It was noted a couple of eagle eyed hashers that even Tail Lamp was doing the long........what is going on today?????
Ringpiece took a short cut here as her back was hurting, would that be the same 'hurting' that happened because you were drunk and fell over???? Hmmm! The rest of us followed the trail through the forest where Groucho apparently admitted to having a limp day, I wasn't privy to that conversation but I think the less said the better! It only got worse though as he then declared 'has anyone seen any beavers?' Well I never! What can you reply to that! On to the next fish hook then a check.
On we went over the road seeing Spocky on the brow of the hill then right, down to a well rested Ringpiece. After checking it out again we set off past the model airfield out towards the firing range. On the main path we encountered the first of the horses we'd been warned of. Once they'd passed, on up we went and back into the woods ending up at a regroup at the rope swing. The usual culprit wasn't having a go today though, Spocky was in charge of Itsy today. However, Twin Peaks accepted this task willingly, followed by Suzanne.
Once we crossed over the road we were soon at the sweetie stop and a very scenic stop it was too. Nice selection of sweets today, jelly babies, liquorice allsorts and wine gums. After a hash photo it was time to set off again, so our reliable hare tells us its on on that way, only for Stat Nav to say no it isnt, it's that way! On on again to another long short split ending at yet another very scenic regroup. I think they have to get an award for most scenic regroups. On back over the road again, roadkill anyone? Just to confuse us all the trail headed up hill not down the hill towards the car park as we thought. Here the hare said we could cut out a bit of the trail as it was already coming up to 12:30. This led to exclamations of 'I told you so' from Chesty as apparently Stat Nav had tried to lay an A2B again. We started making our way through the woods, followed Chesty, got lost, came back and followed Stat Nav! Once out of the woods we were on a straight run home first stopping at a regroup where the sheriff decided to warm his cockles in the sunshine.......quite literally, see photo above!
Fines were handed out to Chesty for reasons too numerous to mention, mostly to do with haring. X Bitz was fined for being a bit dizzy, cornflakes in the fridge, keys left in the ignition etc! Fruity was fined for stripping or was she fined for not stripping?? I think we raised about £8 for Comic Relief. A great trail enjoyed in the lovely sunshine today.
Groucho gave extensive instructions of how to get to Bullers Hill CP for next weeks hash. But I can't remember them! Apart from don't park in the actual car park, use the wasteland on the right hand side just before the car park. On On to next week.

Tuesday, March 10

8th March - Warren CP - Tampa



Twenty-nine hashers were on parade this morning to greet our hare, Tampa plus Ben the Dog. However one hasher was noticable for his being on parade I refer of course to Radiohead who graced us, the assembled hashers, with his first appearance of the year. In reality he shouldn't have been here but on the Grizzly. He informed us the he was a little under the weather or was it whether I do the Grizzly or not? Several hashers suggested he might need to go to the chemist, to which the under the weather/whether Radiohead did not respond. The hare, Tampa greeted us in the usual way then informed everyone of a world surplus of flour by announcing that the trail was three and on to the sweetie stop and then four and on, Spocky take note! After murmurs from the gathered throng we set off at blistering pace for about five minutes then came a check and for some strange reason I thought we were entering a picket line, few hashers were active or did they all go to the same booze up last night. As luck would have it our below par hasher, Radiohead, who was way in the distance proudly proclaimed on on, then seconds later came back towards the picket line to announce that he had discovered a back check. If that wasn't enough he then informed us that he was going to the bog. Soon we were all in the bog in some sort of crocodile formation meandering from one water-free area to the next.Once clear of the bog we picked up our pace all except the Sherriff who was busy writing his memiors into his black book. Eventually the sweet stop appeared, the hare panicking slightly unsure to whether he had enough sweets was heard to say "I didn't expect this many today". Once the sweets had been given a new home we were invited by the hare to check it out,the picket line was in place in record time but as luck would have it not all of the hashers fancied spending the night on Woodbury Common especially as dark rain clouds were now gathering as well as a very strong wind. Several hashers including Twin Peaks,Radiohead and Ullage were all spotted by the Sherriff short cutting, which as all law abiding hashers know is a very serious offence. They were all fined 10p each once back at the finish.
Tail-Lamp presented Swooner with the pink handbag for going off into the undergrowth for some form of relief so we were informed.
Two new hashers were named, one now known as Twice Daily and the other Runs Again.

Next hash at FOUR FIRS WOODBURY COMMON ON SUNDAY 15 MARCH AT 11.00

Sunday, March 1

1st March - Mamhead CP, Haldon - Groucho


A fine spring morning up on Haldon Hill where the hashers all gathered, not so many this week, only about 17, I think word had got out about what a shambles the hash would start off as. Off to a great start the hare told us which way to go, only for us to come across a back check straight away. He then had to guide us in the right direction again which led us straight back through the car park. Tut tut Groucho, did you not realise the fine for leading the hash within view of the car park is to buy a crate of beer???
On On we went, past the car park only to get ourselves all confused again at the next check, Hyde was in the distance but with no calling, Spocky and Chad had disappeared into the undergrowth (make of that what you will????) with the hare stood at the check. The hare suddenly decides to shout 'on back Chad' unfortunately he was actually shouting to Stat Nav. Chad appears from the undergrowth only for us to tell him Groucho wasn't actually shouting to him......confused??? We were! So we all followd where Chad and Spocky had headed off as the hare had called the others back, only to hear him bellowing in the distance. We never did quite manage to figure out what he was shouting, only that we thought he was doing his best Woodpecker impression! Either that or a bear caught in a trap. Eventually with a bit more hare direction we crossed the road and ran up past the car park.......again.....2 crates of beer then Groucho??!!
Onto a check we came which quickly got called onto another check. But Groucho trying his best to confuse us today said on to check here, meaning the first one, had he forgotton that he'd laid the 2nd one so close? There was a lot of loitering going on at this point, for those that didn't realise there was a lot of name discussions being held. The loitering meant that Tampa, Bell Toll and Tail Lamp had to run back quite a distance on their fish hook.
A lot more tramping through the forest led us on to the obelisk and then on to the long short split before arriving at the sweetie stop at the very picturesque spot overlooking the valley. Here we had a hash photo and fruit pastilles and liquorice allsorts.
In predictable fashion on on was called down the ridiculously steep hill which almost wiped out a few hashers, Bell Toll didn't look very stable and Tail Lamp almost flew down the last bit, Bag Lady ever gracefully slid down on her arse!
Around the corner a cheeky little Marshal Farts was sat in the tree flicking bits of twig at passing hashers. We then came upon another back check which led us back up the ridiculously steep hill. However at the bottom of the hill hidden in the undergrowth sat a little Buddha which Chad pointed out 'I can't believe it's not Buddha' Oh dear!!!!
On up and up we went with Chesty taking Tuned In on a little detour before the regroup through a mass of brambles, nice. Poor little JC followed and was last seen up to his neck in them!
On to another long short split which then led us quite quickly on the trail back to the car park (for the 3rd time).
We had naming ceremonies today for Finn - Marshal Farts, Beth - Jekyll, Nigel - Hyde. The pink handbag was awarded to Tail Lamp for AGAIN asking 'how many' when someone said it was a back check. There were fines for most people including Groucho owing the hash 2 crates of beer for his misdemeanor. Odd Bitz even fined himself for throwing a stick for Suicide and then fetching it himself!
On On to Warren Cp next week and good luck to all those taking part in The Grizzly / Cub run.